i'm in gryffindor!

VintageVampire19's Blog


backkick:

LOL like i would know.


Things parents forget to tell their children:

  • Bodies are hairy. No matter the gender, your face will have hair and that is more than okay.
  • Your butthole is going to have some hair too. And maybe your nipples. And your tummy. And where ever else.
  • Stretch marks. Those are a thing. Everyone gets ‘em. If you don’t, you probably don’t have skin.
  • Vaginas smell. Every vagina has a scent. Don’t worry about it! (Unless something seems wrong, then go get it checked out! No need to feel embarrassed or ashamed.)
  • Vaginas come in all different shapes, sizes, colors, flavors. All are beautiful.
  • Penises come in all different shapes, sizes, colors, flavors. All are beautiful.
  • You don’t need to shave anything if you don’t want to. It’s tooootally not mandatory. 
  • Sometimes people get butt acne. 
  • You can have a vagina and want short hair and think dresses are just the worst.
  • You can have a penis and want long hair and think dresses are just the best. 
  • You can wear whatever you want and style your hair however you want.
  • You can even think whatever the hell you want.
  • People might tell you that you are a girl because you have a vagina. People might tell you that you are a boy because you have a penis. People will tell you what your gender is. But in reality, you don’t have to be that gender. You don’t have to be either of those genders. 
  • You are what you are and it’s just the worst thing if you try and hide that.

This is beautiful.

(Source: romantickissingporn)

Via I am Jack's beating heart.

holyballls:

i can’t wait to be a dad. 

(Source: nancytoledo)





(Source: mystandards)









holymotherofrowling:

returntothemother:

How I proposed to my girlfriend fiance, Alley:

I’ve been thinking about this for a long time, it was the obvious decision to marry her, but it wasn’t so obvious as to how I would pop the question.

I have always wanted to do it big. I’ve entertained a lot of ideas, from renting ad space on the big screen at our local movie theater to display a giant graphic with a larger-than-life proposal, to doing a cliche write-it-out-in-christmas-lights-on-the-front-lawn gig. I figured, my feelings for her are massive, so the proposal should be equally massive.

I did neither of those things, and decided that I didn’t need a big presentation after all. Just a big idea. So I decided to create something deeply personal.

Alley is a big Harry Potter geek. I say that in the fondest of manners. She’s gotten me into the theaters for the last three films, and on the couch to watch the first five numerous times. That’s saying a lot because I was jaded regarding the entire franchise, and took no shame in lampooning her interest. That is, until she got me hooked, and gladly watched as I inserted my foot into my mouth. 

After the film series concluded, and seeing how disheartened she was that there would be no more looking forward to midnight outings to catch the first run of the next HP flick, I decided to make her a sequel. 

I didn’t quite go all-out and write a killer fan-fic treatment. Instead, I created a dust jacket that would pass for a real-deal sequel, if I timed it right and had the element of surprise on my side.

When I finally got the ring, I commandeered her copy of the Deathly Hallows and did something that might otherwise seem sacrilege to any other hardcore potter fan… I hollowed out a portion of the book to seat the lower half of the ring box inside.

I added a neat feature involving some ribbon that translated quite well, in the context of marriage, paired with a clever note… I won’t spoil it. Check the images for yourself :)

I ended up asking her on Christmas Eve, in front of my family, presenting the book as a gift. She even thought, for a few seconds, that a Harry Potter release slipped into the market without her knowing it!


Via Hogwarts' Guide to Life


xvampirax:

iwantcupcakes:

epicmurdock:

Bless this post

Here’s the video — 4-year-old girl blasts companies for forcing pink stuff on girls.

this girl is awesome!!!

This will be my future child.

(Source: laakeycharms)


Via I lost a Universe!

You must be an angel,

eiregirl05:

papercranes-paperplanes:

barthvader:

because i haven’t blinked since i saw your face.

most flawless

pickup line

ever

If a guy used this pick up line on me I’d date him. I’d date him so hard.

Via Caelitus Mihi Vires

tinaratedtinaapproved:

Whoa. Whoa. Your kids can have them fucking tiny chukkas and twee little chambrays. My daughter’s gonna slice your little hipster kids up 47 ronin style.





yes-butno:

People always seem to stereotype writers as quiet, depressed, cigarette-smoking, black-coffee drinkers who spend all their time alone holed up in a dark room.




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